Since Motley Crue Sold Their Catalog, I Came Up With Some Product Ideas

Motley Crue just sold their entire musical catalog to BMG for a reported $150 million. Which means that soon enough we’ll be hearing some of our fave Crue songs in commercials of all kinds. So I thought I’d try to make a buck off them too with some special Motley Crue branded product ideas. All I want is like %10 of whatever you make on these. So Vince, Nikki, Mick, and Tommy please feel free to use these ideas, just shoot me a check. I knew this marketing degree would come in handy one day.

Kickstart My Heart Coffee. Would be an easy idea to pull off and is way more legal than Kickstart My Heart brand meth.

Home Sweet Home Security Systems.

Dr. Feelgood Brand pain relievers. They could be anything from aspirin to opioids.

Shout At The Devil religious clothing for the hard rocking nun or preacher.

Live Wire Electrical Services. This could be franchised out to all major metros for electricians and journeymen.

Girls, Girls, Girls Escort Services. Of course these are only escorts, except in Pahrump Nevada, then anything goes.

Primal Scream Therapy and Counseling Services.

Smokin’ In The Boys Room Vapes for teenagers. Yeah I know its originally a Brownsville Station song but Motley pays royalties on it. Plus they could do a Smokin’ In The Girls Room set for the ladies too.

Hooligan’s Holiday Decorating, for the heathen holiday lovers.

Don’t Go Away Mad Breakup Services. For when you want to end a relationship for good.

Too Young To Fall In Love Birth Control and Condoms, because you’re just out to sow some wild oats right now because, you know, you’re too young for feels.

If I Die Tomorrow Life Insurance. Because you might die tomorrow.

Slice Of Your Pie Desserts, found in the freezer cases of all quality grocery chains.

Ten Seconds To Love Erectile Dysfunction pills. They’d need to be super fast acting though.

I’m pretty sure that a few of these would be hot sellers and not just for Crue fans. So if any entrepreneurs want to use these and make a mint just email me at the radio station and and we’ll start a business!

In the music industry, it’s exceedingly common for artists to yearn for ownership over their original master recordings,...

Posted by Rolling Stone on Tuesday, November 30, 2021
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